( take the damn hug, quentin demands, and julian - well. he isn't fighting against it, even if he's not quite leaning into it just yet. because quentin isn't wrong: julian does need this. maybe not from quentin himself, but jesus. the last several days have been hectic, he's gone back and forth between fine and falling apart, except he doesn't have the freedom to just collapse into pieces in front of everyone else. that's always been part of his problem: julian can't fall apart around the people who rely on him, so he instead isolates himself from everyone who could lend a hand when he needs it so he can collapse without feeling like he's failing someone.
but while he's claimed quire as one of his own here, they - haven't been close. he wasn't holding onto him when they weren't sure if santo would come back the first time he collapsed into dust. he wasn't there during m-day, nor the funeral following, he didn't need someone to hold him up while the world was falling apart around them, so julian hasn't ever been that person for him. it's not like with cessily, or sooraya, noriko, josh, any of the others julian has taken under his wing at one point or another. he's just another asshole who is too powerful for his own good. )
I'll kill you if you ever say a damn word about this.
( it's an empty threat, and julian knows quentin'll pick that up easily enough. he sucks in another breath, lets it out with a shudder as his arms raise up to wrap tight around quentin. )
no subject
but while he's claimed quire as one of his own here, they - haven't been close. he wasn't holding onto him when they weren't sure if santo would come back the first time he collapsed into dust. he wasn't there during m-day, nor the funeral following, he didn't need someone to hold him up while the world was falling apart around them, so julian hasn't ever been that person for him. it's not like with cessily, or sooraya, noriko, josh, any of the others julian has taken under his wing at one point or another. he's just another asshole who is too powerful for his own good. )
I'll kill you if you ever say a damn word about this.
( it's an empty threat, and julian knows quentin'll pick that up easily enough. he sucks in another breath, lets it out with a shudder as his arms raise up to wrap tight around quentin. )